Why people gossip: Gossip psychology
Let’s talk about gossip and the people who dissolve them. And how innocent fun for one people, can turn into a personal tragedy for others.
For some people, gossiping is like an addiction – they are always looking for a suitable opportunity to discuss someone’s life. Simple lunch break comes down to the traditional ceremony of “washing” other people’s bones, well simply because talking about something more rational (even weather would suffice) is not fun enough.
Functions and causes of gossip
Everything has its own meaning, even gossip in its senselessness, for someone – is the meaning of life and the only psychological protection.
The first reason people gossip is herd instinct. They are happy to know that they are in the company of the same “like-minded people” with common needs and views. Membership in such a “circle of interests” gives them a sense of security and confidence, and all these friendships in order to discuss and giggle at someone – this is an integral part of such a relationship.
Gossip also satisfies emotional hunger. People need bread and circuses, or so they say. And since gladiatorial fights in the walls of the office or home are a pretty rare phenomenon, it is somehow necessary to satisfy this hunger, for example, in such a primitive way as to discuss others. By the way, it is emotional hunger that makes people watch talk shows and read all kinds of gossip blogs and magazines.
Sometimes, through gossip, a person subconsciously expresses their hidden desires or denies their own unsightly qualities. In this case, gossip has a compensatory function, which is actually very sad, because it is the only way to realize their unfulfilled desires and wild fantasies.
And, of course, idleness, multiplied by an evaluative judgment. Boredom wakes up the desire to make the world brighter and more fun for the individual. The only thing in such a case is to find a suitable “test subject”.
The sad consequences of gossip
The main feature of rumors and gossip is their unique ability to grow out of proportion.
Gossip Girl heard the “chime”, added something from her side, told the added version to the other person. He added “topping”, passed it on to the third. The third has a sick imagination and personal accounts with the object of discussion, so the information will reach the fourth in such a twisted form that the very first (the initiator of all this outrage) will get confused himself, once he hears the final story.
And what will be the result? In the end – a person who was a target for such an attack becomes collectively ridiculed and humiliated.
You can’t even imagine the percentage of suicides among people who have been bullied based on rumors and gossip, deceived and slandered! And not so much because of the rumors themselves, but because of the powerlessness of proving otherwise. Especially vulnerable to this are teenagers whose unformed psyche is unable to resist human meanness and perceives everything like a tragedy.
The territory of marasmus and lies…
The behavior of some individuals on the Internet, in general, is astonishing: confidence in their impunity and anonymity allows them to say such things for which in reality they would be held fully responsible. Some extraordinary case is discussed on from all sides, savored and mixed with offensive speculations and “authoritative” opinions. The main characters of events are discussed by people with different levels of intelligence and decency, bias and prejudice. People’s rumors are capable not only of lying and misrepresenting everything but also of twisting the fact entirely. And there is no end to this abomination.
This is the sickness of not only the internet… Our federal channels also practice such a sin (or sometimes, this is the only thing they do), discussing someone’s private life based on memories, speculations, and rumors. It becomes even worse, when that person has long been dead, can not object to anything, which gives the right to all participants to say anything about him or her: because of personal dislike, patchy memories and just their own scarcity of mind. And everyone tries to shout out, to prove, to be heard. A bunch of hypocrites, gossip and urban madmen!
How do you confront gossip?
The fact that something has to be done about this is understandable, but the choice of means is not great. The common advice of ignoring in many cases simply does not work. Especially when a nasty rumor turns into a direct insult to honor and dignity, and you, with external peace of mind, keep literally boiling inside with the outrage, resentment, and injustice. So you can earn yourself not only a nervous breakdown but a bunch of diseases of physiological nature. Patience and containment of emotions – is still not the best way to fight with gossip.
Do not hurry to justify yourself to anyone. If there are witnesses and evidence, it is possible to solve the issue within the legal field. If “you can not find the end”, the situation is out of control, and talking to the inferior (otherwise gossipers are not called) does not give anything – change the environment, go. This is not a defeat, not a shameful escape that affects your self-esteem – this is the presence of brain and common sense. Direct confrontation with the use of physical force is not suitable for everyone, although sometimes it is very effective (this is not a guide to action on our part!), but the consequences may sometimes turn against you.
Gossip Girls or Gossip Girls: who’s more guilty?
It’s a very popular opinion that men are much bigger gossipers than women. Where did the statistics come from? All we can say is that there are enough gossip mongers among both! Just the topics and forms of presentation are different, but the goal is one – to rub your tongue and laugh behind the back of the one at whose expense they are trying to assert themselves …